We all do push to begin to work, this is normal, we have to overcome one momentum with another one

21 Oct 1985

saturated reds and yellow radiate in the evening sun's shine over and through the trees = autumn. and deep, blue sky.

Dear Phillip,

Your letter brought joy. Your thoughts are open and healthy. Often I admire you insight into human actions. Since action is so thoroughly interrelated to feeling and thought (therefore) it does not matter where we search (dig) or study; we can paint a house, a billboard, a painting- soon we come to similar thoughts, similar feelings, similar advance in wisdom.

what does matter, profoundly so, is out attitude, our longing - as our longing is synchronized or peripheral or opposed to what we are doing. 

when our doing is neutral, then our longing can continue to unfold.

when our doing is contrary to our longing, we are soon frustrated - the longing will obtain two stages - one of which we fall into, the other we lose it or we become fanatic in holding on and become neurotic about it.

Once more, the poorest person can be of highest dignity. what we can observe is = when we rush - we lose all or at least much of this state. [dignity = insight, clarity, responsiveness = feeling, recall and foresight] And from your letter I can see that you are aware of all of this. You are saying what I think, your way, I'm saying what you think my way. So we are at ease and at home. 

The disappointment at the art competition (art competition = is that not a contradiction in terms?) So many times I went through this - as you. In part, I was spoiled because between 1952 and 1972 I made just about all and any show I applied for - then came the great surprise - I wanted some of my portraits accepted! --No way--! And who can judge it better what matters, and what does not, but the maker?

Phillip - let us remind one another, at times, that our social structure is such that we need arts- period. Arts - nothing else. the face, the human face is a power house, an enigma so powerful that this society with this structure of Art-need cannot bear the sight of an individual, unless a membership is emblazed upon the face which makes it a machine part.

Again I say, do what you do to earn your place to sleep and food. Let us not try to confirm, convince, change or inform others. Not yet. two good reasons 1. the lot (or bunch or the many) are not ready to give up their dope or drug or addictive whatever. 2. the very few, who are acting in accord to natural dispositions are all in a most gentle way (inductively, indirectly) just doing this, which we are all advancing to - insight, little by little - very slowly - time means nothing to the natural event. actually time does mean something to the natural event as the 9 months of pregnancy versus 6 months or 12 months, still it is the time it takes which we are often not willing to wait for. we push, we rush - and we lose our senses.

Therefore I will retire as soon as possible. (this "as possible" is not more of the old rush, but patiently waiting for the moment when I can retire with a little bit more than just my shirt). I heard that by December a package is ready. Soon I have an interview with our president = it is he who can advance or stop such action.

For all the years I said = let us save during this time that we have no money: it will be the only time when saving is possible, let's save some for retirement. Now that I intend to retire I realize how the pennies then would mean dollars now. But now no saving will help much. I need a studio, foundry...

But 29 years ago the pennies would bring a difference. Still, I feel good about stepping aside and begin 100% effort on sculpting. Not for show, exhibit... but friends.

You are describing the death, illness of your father. Again I admire you acumen, your perceptive ability, your insight. Again - no confrontation will help, nothing will help but our own action (doing), affording, bringing out our own careful work, honestly felt, the kinks worked out. That is slow, but that is development. the only one worth to have - around the globe!

Spring 1985 - Yes - what a great thought you are evoking by asking if I will be at our woodlot. Yes, of course, this is quite vital to me, the sculptor. Welcome, help building a studio. thereafter, welcome and use the studio! [It is 12:35 the next day - another art class History Of Western Art Forms. teaching is, in general, from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. drawing and psychological aspect at night] I am already out the door and beginning my lecture haha! It is demanding - taking it seriously. So is everything. Your job the same way. therefore remain at ease with yourself. paint - but do not push. you are by now clearly distinguishing between pushing yourself to work from pushing the work. We all do push to begin to work, this is normal, we have to overcome one momentum with another one.

-in admiration for your working as a painter. more tomorrow. 

Love, Wolfram